Life has caught up with me. All my friends were online and in the House of Duras Fleet
in Star Trek Online – and I’d been neglecting what I my responsibilities to the real world
were – like really getting down with a job search. And now, 30 days and either I get a job
Or I end up on the street.
10 months of playing the same game – a personal record for me but now it’s time
to pull my head out of the sand and face reality
There is only one source of hope left – and it’s not Obama and his Santa Claus act
nor is it in myself. I can’t even get out of bed under my own steam.
A year and 4 months ago I was struggling – but proud. I was in top physical condition
with my 5 day a week commute by bike to work – about 75 miles a week
I had life under control. I was “surviving”. And then – fired from job.
now – 1 year and 4 months later, I’m no longer psychically fit. 2 miles of bike riding
at a quick pace and my chest starts hurting.
I gave up on going to one job interview because my chest hurting walking to the bus stop.
Not a good thing at all
The news is really nasty – how can anyone kill 20 children like in that Connecticut School?
I’m supposed to be a Christian – but hardly even have a moment to spare for God
and most of the time when I’m thinking of God I’m blaming him
for the mess I got myself into
So, will God accept me back? I don’t know. But there is absolutely no hope elsewhere.
If this blog continues past 30 days – then God has helped me.
It’s now almost 8PM and I’m bored out of my skull. It’s been tempting to re-install
Star Trek Online but I have to admit – it’s a serious addiction that I have to overcome
I want to be around for my granddaughter, and what I’ve been doing
for the last year and 4 months hasn’t been working
So I think I’ll go to bed early, get plenty of sleep, and spend all day tomorrow
with my church friends. Real friends instead of “virtual”